Irish Eyes – Chapter Six
Twenty-four hours after the wake, Michael was buried. The ceremony went off with few people speaking to one another and many uneasy glances. Stephanie was filled with uncertainty. Gwen’s story about the girl that accompanied her just did not add up and Cael was once again conspicuous by his absence. She vowed to find out the truth as soon as the unpleasantness of attending her brother-in-law’s funeral was over. Cael had problems of her own with the entire Foley clan staring daggers at her through the proceedings. The only two allies she had were Brigid and Emma, and neither of them were in the position to help her out if the angry glares turned into something uglier. Fortunately, even with the latent hostility in the air, the burial went off without a single argument. It was a cheerless affair that all of the parties involved were glad to see come to its conclusion. The Foleys returned to Ireland and Cael was left to sort out the changes in her life once again. Everything returned to normal, or at least as normal as any of the days had been since her transformation.
That Saturday afternoon, Gwen found Cael dressed in the same dirty, oversized red t-shirt that she had worn for days before the wake. The problem of finding a new wardrobe for her daughter was certainly an important one, but Cael seemed perfectly content to lounge around the house all day. Her hair was starting to look like a bird’s nest again, which annoyed Gwen quite a deal, considering how much effort she had put into making it look good just days before. At least Cael was taking showers again. It was a small blessing, but Gwen knew that she had to take things one step at a time with the girl. She contemplated offering a Sunday outing where Cael could pick out some clothes in her size as well as get the haircut that she so desperately wanted. If she was not going to take care of her hair, Gwen figured there was no point in keeping it long. Unfortunately, Gwen had other problems to deal with before she could have a mother-daughter excursion, namely her sister. Stephanie was insistent that they needed to talk and a Saturday afternoon became the ideal time to do so.
“Cael, can’t you please put something else on? Your Aunt Stephanie is going to be here soon and I don’t want you looking like you’re living out of your laundry hamper.” Gwen pleaded.
“What do you want me to wear, Mom? Would you like it if I put on that bra you bought me and one of your dresses?” Cael shot back, still as combative as ever about her femininity. “Everything I own is going to look the same on me, baggy and pajama-like. I’ve worn all black for two days straight and I’m ready to just be comfortable again, so give me a break. It’s just Aunt Stephanie. She doesn’t even know who I am. She’ll just think I’m your rude house guest or something.”
“I think your Aunt is a little more intuitive than that. She’s been looking at me strangely for the past two days. I’m telling you, she suspects something.”
“So what if she does? It’s not like she is going to figure out that your son is now a girl, and even if she does, so what? One more person knowing makes my life a hell of a lot easier. Oh, and whether she suspects something or not has no bearing on what I wear.” Cael retorted. “Now calm down, would you? Saturday is college football day, not bother Cael with pointless yammering day.”
The doorbell rang and Gwen scrambled to finish putting everything in order. The house was pristine, which was amazing, considering the mess that their guests left at the wake two days earlier. With their busy schedule, it was a wonder that Gwen found time to clean again. The only thing that looked out of place was Cael looking like a bum on her couch with a can of soda in one hand and leftover chips and dip on the table in front of her. There was no more time to argue about appearances. She rushed to the door and straightened herself out, but not before reminding Cael whose house this was.
“You know, I’m still your mother. You’re never too old to be punished.”
“Sorry.” Cael apologized.
Stephanie had a knack for being prompt in meeting her appointments, so it was no surprise to Gwen when she showed up about fifteen minutes before she expected her. Gwen offered her little sister a smile and a hug, which were returned without fail. Cael craned her neck over the back of the couch and watched the sisters greeting. They were both overdressed for the occasion. There was no reason to look like you were going out to a nice restaurant for brunch at home with a family member. A future of designer clothes haunted her, making her tremble a bit before she turned her attention back to the game.
“How was the ride over? How are the kids doing?” Gwen opened.
“They were all fine, Gwen. I’m not going to let you bog me down with idle chit-chat though. You know what I want to talk about.” Stephanie cut to the chase. “Where do you think a good place to talk would be? I envisioned us on opposite ends of the couch in my head.”
“Actually, the kitchen would be better. Cae—Caitlin is watching football or something in the living room right now.”
Stephanie peered over Gwen’s shoulder to get a good look at the girl again. She was surprised to see her looking like such a complete slob. Dressed in some of Cael’s clothing, her hair a mess, her legs in desperate need of a shave and sucking ranch dip off her fingertips; what kind of girl was she? Her sister’s behavior seemed even more suspect now as she could not imagine Gwen putting up with such a slovenly girl unless there was something important about her.
“She really knows how to clean up, doesn’t she?” Stephanie commented. “It’s good that she’s still here, though. I can always ask her directly if you try to dodge my questions.”
The sisters adjourned to the kitchen, where Gwen had prepared coffee and some cucumber and cream cheese sandwiches for them to snack on as they talked. She took her time in pouring Stephanie a cup before she finally sat down. Her obvious attempts to delay the conversation did not go unnoticed. Stephanie gave her sister an exasperated look as she waited.
“Are you done now?” Stephanie waited for confirmation. “Good. Now, we both know that that girl out there is not one of Cael’s friends. She’s been by your side constantly for the last couple of days while Cael has been a complete no show. It also seems like you let her get away with things that I know bother you quite a deal, and then there’s the real kicker. You must have thought I was pretty stupid if you didn’t think I would notice that she looks just like you.”
“I don’t know what you think is going on, but I’m telling you that she’s just a house guest. There’s nothing special or unique about her.” Gwen lied, her eyes shifting away.
“You can’t even look at me when you say that. Come on, you can tell me the truth. I’m your sister. If you can’t tell me, then who can you tell? If my suspicions are right, I can understand why you needed to lie at the wake. There were a lot of Michael’s family members around and you didn’t want to make a big scene.”
Gwen kept up her mute act. She was thinking about what her sister’s reaction would be to the truth. Her sister was notoriously bullheaded when it came to things like this, so she knew that she would not be able to keep silent forever. She figured the worst that could happen would be that Stephanie would laugh at her and call her crazy. She should have made Cael turn off the television and join her at the table. Going in as a unified front would have made the truth much easier to tell.
“Just say it already. You cheated on Michael, right?”
Gwen’s jaw dropped and she nearly burst into a fit of laughter. She struggled to keep them back as she looked across the table at her sister.
“What would ever make you think that?”
“Well that girl, she looks like she could be your daughter, and her name is Caitlin. That’s the name you had picked out for Cael if he had been born a girl. She’s the lovechild of your illicit affair, isn’t she?” Stephanie asked, confused.
“No. I never cheated on Michael, though in retrospect, maybe I should have.”
“Fine, who is she then?”
“Well…” Gwen hesitated before divulging in a matter-of-fact way. “She’s my daughter.”
Stephanie’s face contorted in disbelief. How could her sister be so brazen as to deny something and then moments later confirm it? Gwen only ever had one child to Stephanie’s knowledge, so why would she hide a daughter from everybody unless she cheated on Michael? The pieces just did not fit.
“Gwen, that isn’t funny. I just asked you that and you said no. I seriously doubt that you managed to hide a mystery daughter that you had with Michael for all these years. I mean, she’s a grown woman. She has to be Cael’s age. What’s the deal? Wait, let me guess. You and Michael were living on a limited income when Cael and this girl were born and so when you took that trip to Ireland shortly after, you put the poor girl up for adoption, thinking that you would be unable to care for two children. She’s been bouncing around foster homes ever since and was finally able to track you down a few days ago.”
Cael happened to walk into the kitchen at this moment and overheard Stephanie’s convoluted theory. She snickered as she put the dip back in the refrigerator and then turned to the two women talking at the table.
“That’s even lamer than the truth.” Cael blurted out. “We’re not living in some Lifetime original movie where everybody has cancer and there’s some stupid female bonding at the end. Get a clue.”
“Well, since your so-called mother doesn’t want to tell me, why don’t you?”
“Think about it for a moment. Mom only had one child—a child that’s been missing in action at his own father’s funeral. At the same time, a mysterious girl shows up whom your sister claims is her daughter. Mom still only has one child, Aunt Stephanie.” Cael explained, making it sound as if the answer was obvious. “I’m Cael.”
Stephanie found her skepticism rising. There was no way that was possible. This must be some kind of elaborate prank, she thought. She searched the room, almost expecting to find hidden cameras and a TV host that would jump out and tell her she had been punked. Instead, she just found Gwen nodding in affirmation. They were being far too casual about this. Neither one of them was cracking a smile or bursting into laughter.
“No, no…” Stephanie objected, shaking her head. “No, that’s not possible. People don’t just change—you’re too short to be Cael. I mean, Cael’s not a transsexual. Look at you, you’re a girl. You can’t be Cael.”
“Fine, I’m not Cael. We’re perpetuating an elaborate hoax to try and screw you out of your money or something. Mom was never your sister to begin with, she snuck into the family at a young age and pretended to be your sister in hopes that one day she would be able to take you for your life’s savings. I’m the partner in all of this that she hired after the son angle wasn’t working out.” Cael spat back in the most sarcastic tone possible.
It was a huge leap in logic for Stephanie to believe that this girl could in any way, shape or form be Cael, but it was the only option being presented to her. In a way, it did explain all the strange behavior over the last few days, and the girl certainly looked like what she would imagine Cael would look like if he were a girl. Not to mention, she behaved far more like a man than a woman. No self-respecting woman would allow herself to fall so far. Was it really possible? How did someone go from being a world class athlete one day to an attractive young woman the next?
“If you really are Cael, then how—”
“No! I am not going to waste my entire afternoon placating you with the how and why of it. It was magic, that’s all you need to know. If you want to know more, I’m sure my mom will regale you with the long and boring details. Now, if you’ll excuse me, halftime is probably ending soon.”
Cael walked out of the room, but not before snatching the tray of appetizers that Gwen prepared for her lunchtime talk with her sister. Football required food, even if it was some froofy little finger sandwiches. She still had a lesson to learn about overindulging with her reduced stomach capacity.
“I just don’t know what to do about her.” Gwen complained. “Ever since the change, she’s been completely rude, refuses to leave the house, and thinks that she’s entitled to her moodiness because of what she’s been through.”
“Um, can we take a step back, Gwen?” Stephanie asked, still looking as if somebody just told her that Santa Claus was not real. “Saying that something doesn’t need explanation because it’s magic just doesn’t cut it. Magic’s not even supposed to be real. So, if you could, please tell me the whole story.”
Gwen sighed. The last time she told this story, it took a lot out of her and Cael reacted badly. She hoped it would go better with her sister. She was desperate for an ally that she could talk to when raising a recently transformed daughter did not go well. With Cael’s constant attitude, she needed Stephanie to believe her.
“Yeah, we’ll start after the beginning, for the best way to start is to tell you that Cael was born a healthy baby girl by the name of Caitlin Rose Foley…”
***
“How’d it go?” Cael asked her mother, who was returning from saying goodbye to Stephanie.
“About as well as can be expected. If you didn’t look so convincing, I doubt she would have believed us though.” Gwen replied.
The addition of her Aunt Stephanie into the inner circle of people that knew about her was both a blessing and another problem all together. On the one hand, it gave Cael another person that she could be comfortable around. Being able to act like herself without people thinking that she was a girl was important to her. The problem with Stephanie knowing was that it gave her mother a co-conspirator to work with. While she had not come out and said it, there were moments with her mother that Cael sensed the woman was pleased that she now had a daughter. She took far too much joy in brushing her hair and seeing her dressed up for the first time, and even though the clothes she wore were still boyish in nature, the fact that her mother had purchased a bra for her was foreboding. Now, with Stephanie on her side, Cael anticipated that her mother would step up her push for more ladylike behavior.
“Convincing, just what I was hoping to be.” Cael bemoaned.
“You should be happy. You have another person that you can turn to when things get tough. I’m going back to work on Monday and I won’t be here to take care of you all day long, so if you’re having a particularly difficult time one day, you can give Steph a call.”
“Doesn’t she have her own kids to take care of? Really Mom, I can take care of myself. If you’re worried that I’m going to have a nervous break down and commit suicide or something, you put yourself at ease. I’m not an idiot.” Cael argued.
“You’d instill a lot more confidence in me if you at least made an attempt to go out. I’d love to take you to the mall tomorrow and get a few things—a coat, a few pairs of pants, some shirts—so that you have a little more freedom to leave the house. You’ll feel so much better and you could even get your hair cut while we’re out.” Gwen urged hopefully.
Cael saw through her ruse. She was confident that the moment her mother had her at the mall there would begging and pleading for her to try on various outfits. She would claim that there was no harm in trying something on and then gush over the results, adding it to a growing pile of things that Cael would have no interest in ever wearing. Okay, maybe it was a bit worst case scenario, but the likelihood that something along those lines would happen to a lesser extent was still high.
“No thank you. I’ll let you know when I’m ready to go out. Until then, could you please give me a break? I’m dealing with this in my own way, I promise you.”
Gwen let out a disheartened groan. Why did she have to be the bad guy every single time she suggested something? Cael was never so belligerent as a boy. She did not expect Cael to accept being a woman wholeheartedly, but she wished that she would stop trying to avoid it entirely. She was missing out on a unique experience that might not be there in the future if Cael got her way.
“Very well, I won’t ask again. I guess I need to get dinner started now. I hope that you at least give the idea a little more thought. I’m only looking out for you, you know.”
Cael tentatively agreed, offering her mother the typical teenage response of ‘whatever’. There would be little chance that she would give it any serious thought, but agreeing to do so would save a lot of heartache in the long run. With her mother occupied in the kitchen, she returned to her bedroom. The success of getting Aunt Stephanie to believe her story weighed heavily. Could she have similar luck with her friends? She considered that her friends would be much harder to convince. Familiarity and a complicated story would not be enough. They would most likely need reassurance that she was who she claimed to be. She sank down in her computer chair and swiveled around in circles as she tried to think what she could say that would prove she was Cael. What was something that only she would know? In the era of Facebook an MySpace, it was difficult to think of anything that could not be figured out by a little research. In any case, she knew that she needed her friends. She needed the same kind of confidant that her mother had in Aunt Stephanie. She needed a few people that she could trust in treating her like the same old Cael.
How to tell them was another story. She needed to set up a face-to-face encounter. That much was a given. There was something about calling them on the phone, however, that bothered her. All they would hear would be a girl’s voice and it was easy to disregard someone over the phone. They would most likely think it was a prank call and hang up before she got a chance to explain. This left the internet as the likely place to set up a meeting. It was impersonal and yet with instant messaging, there was no chance that her friends would doubt that it was her setting a time and place to meet. What little hesitation she had was flying out the window and fast.
She just hoped that somebody would be online. It would save her a lot of trouble in the long run if they were. She impatiently waited for the computer to load. She had far too many programs set to load on startup and there was always a delay, or at least that was the way it seemed when she was desperate to sign on. Much to her dismay, her friends list was vacant of her closest friends. This gave her few options. She could leave an offline message and hope that they met her at the desired time and place, or she could force an awkward moment.
With her resolve currently at its peak, she elected to do the latter, pulling out her cell and turning it on for the first time in days. The number of missed calls she had was astounding. Even without listening to her voice mail, she knew the content of most of those calls. So, instead of listening to them and discouraging herself, she pulled up Brooke in her address book and sent her a quick text message.
It read “Please sign on to IM” and nothing else. It was a simple message and was really all that needed to be said, but she had a feeling that it would still cause problems. Those became immediately apparent when she received a return message that said “OMG, just call me.” Cael knew that was not possible and knew she was risking a long back and forth where Brooke would inevitably call her, so on the second message she sent “Can’t, IM please.” and then turned off her phone, hoping that it would prompt Brooke to do as she asked.
No luck, she thought, waiting for a little dialogue box to pop up and let her know that Brooke was online. Brooke was not one to tackle problems indirectly, so it was no surprise that she was not willing to play along with Cael’s end around. Before Cael had a chance to give up though, a window popped up with a message from Brooke.
BrookeLynnBabe: Where the hell have you been and why can’t you call me?
CaelElevenOne: I lost my voice. You wouldn’t even recognize me. It’s not important.
BrookeLynnBabe: What do you mean not important? You’ve been gone for over a week now. You can’t say that. I need an explanation.
CaelElevenOne: Well, I’ve been crying a lot the last week and I just haven’t felt like myself at all. I didn’t want anybody to see me in that state.
Cael fibbed while at the same time giving Brooke half truths. It was not like she was going to ask if she had been turned into a girl, so she could say that she did not lie per se, but rather just omit the truth. It was all she could do. She rested her cheek against the palm of her hand as she waited for the next message.
BrookeLynnBabe: That is so typical of a man. I don’t care how much you were crying. You could have at least let me know you needed some time. I mean, you snubbed me at the wake for God’s sake!
CaelElevenOne: Sorry.
BrookeLynnBabe: Yeah, sorry. You are so not getting off that easily.
CaelElevenOne: I’d tell you that I’ll make it up to you, but I know that won’t be good enough, so sorry will have to cut it until we can talk.
BrookeLynnBabe: Aren’t we talking now?
CaelElevenOne: Yes, but I mean face to face. I really miss you and well, there’s a lot I need to tell you. It just needs to be done in person rather than over the phone.
BrookeLynnBabe: That sounds suspiciously like you want to break up with me.
Cael groaned. This was already not working out the way that she wanted it to. She should have suspected as much from Brooke, but for some reason she thought she would be overjoyed just to see that she was all right. She wondered if maybe she should have talked with Trip or Jimmy first. She disregarded that thought right away though. Brooke was her girlfriend and deserved to be the first one she told.
CaelElevenOne: No! >.< Trust me, I do not want to do that.
Though Cael would not have been surprised if Brooke wanted to break up with her once she saw that she was a girl. As much as it was every guy’s fantasy, she could not see Brooke with a woman, nor could she see herself doing much of anything until she was back to her old self. Their relationship would be in name only until then.
BrookeLynnBabe: Good, because that would be completely lousy. Now, what was so important that you had to get me on IM instead of calling me?
CaelElevenOne: I wanted to set up a time and place where I can see you to talk.
BrookeLynnBabe: I’ll be there in 15 minutes.
CaelElevenOne: No! I’m not ready yet.
BrookeLynnBabe: Ready for what? Cael, you’re being far too evasive with details. What is going on with you?
CaelElevenOne: I promise I’ll tell you everything when I see you. I need tomorrow to do something, so how about Monday after your last class? I’ll wait for you at the practice field.
BrookeLynnBabe: That’s fine, but please don’t let me down, Cael.
The exchange continued for a while longer with Cael avoiding giving out any sort of details. She reassured Brooke that she was feeling fine, even though she was far from it, and then she abruptly ended the conversation.
CaelElevenOne: I have to go, Brooke. See you on Monday. Love you. Bye.
She did not even give her girlfriend a chance to object before she signed off. Yet, as soon as she did, the feeling of impending doom pinned her down. “Oh crap, I’m screwed,” echoed in her head, and the urge to sign back on and tell Brooke to forget it was strong. She second-guessed everything about the conversation. She should have let Brooke come over now while she was still revved up rather than wait a few days and lose her nerve. Only the desire to not look like the complete slob she had become kept her from agreeing to it. That was another poor decision, she decided. She thought surely she could have avoided this very situation for at least another couple of weeks if she really tried. She had already made her choice, however, and she had to live with it now.
“Mom! Can you come here for a minute?” Cael called loudly.
Gwen appeared in Cael’s open bedroom door in record speed. If Cael wanted something bad enough to interrupt her making dinner then it had to be important. Her daughter always did have a strong appetite as a boy. She wondered if she would have the same as a girl, or if she would suddenly start picking at her food like a bird. Would she start wanting salads instead of meat and potatoes? It was highly unlikely. She doubted that simply getting a new body would curb Cael’s bad eating habits that much. She would probably just get fuller faster.
“What do you need, sweetie? Dinner will be ready soon. I’m making chili mac. I even bought those little oyster crackers that you love.” Gwen announced.
“That sounds great, Mom. It really does.” Cael replied, thinking about all the pampering her mother was giving her lately. “Anyway, I was just wondering if your offer to go shopping tomorrow was still open. I think getting that hair cut would be a good idea and well I guess I could use some clothes that fit me…”
Cael trailed off as she looked up at her mother’s face. She could not tell if the woman was going to cry or jump up and down like she had just won the lottery. It was a level of shock that one does not often see. Cael began to think that she had broken her mother.
“Mom? Are you all right?”
Gwen’s elation was bubbling to the surface in a very real daydream. She envisioned herself at the mall with Cael, but the trip was far from what the reality would be. She pictured Cael as the ideal daughter rather than one that used to be and still wanted to be a man. It was a pleasant delusion that involved a long trip to the salon followed by hours of shopping and bringing home tons of new outfits. Even if there was no chance of that happening, Gwen was ecstatic that Cael even wanted to leave the house. She wondered what had changed in the half hour or so since they spoke, but decided that it did not really matter as long as the result was the same.
“That’s just wonderful, Cael! Of course the offer still stands. We’re going to have so much fun tomorrow. There are so many shops in the mall that I bet you’ve never even thought of going in before. We’ll definitely have to make a whole day of it. We can even stop and get some lunch before and some dinner after—wherever you like too. I’m so excited!”
“Yeah, I noticed. Can you dial it down a few notches though? I want to keep it simple. No salons, no Victoria’s Secret, just a Great Clips and one of the anchor stores will do fine.” Cael declared, hoping that she could keep her mother’s whims in check.
“Sorry, anything you like, dear. I’m just proud of you for taking a step in the right direction.” Gwen exclaimed proudly.
She wrapped her arms around Cael in a tight hug, forcing the girl to squirm from the surprising strength. She quickly realized that she was showing a little too much excitement, however, and loosened her grip, and then kissed Cael on the forehead.
“Mom, don’t forget about dinner. I’m starving.”
***
Gateway University’s practice field was desolate. Wind swept across the dirt infield and provided the sole onlooker with a chill that penetrated through her brand new plum-colored fleece jacket. Cael pulled the jacket tight and zipped up. She had not noticed the cold on the car ride over, but now that she was standing in the middle of the field—next to the pitcher’s mound—her lithe body shivered. The cold air traveled down through her neck, which was no longer covered by lengths of hair. The trip to the mall the day before left her with her hair practically cropped. Apparently the instructions to cut her hair like a boy’s did not register in the stylist that took care of her, because even with the shorter length, she still thought that it looked rather feminine. Other than the cold, this was the reason why she had her head snugly tucked in a knit cap.
She wished that she had brought a baseball and a glove along so that she could keep herself entertained while she waited for Brooke to show up. As it stood, she just felt cold, isolated and exposed standing out in the open. She kicked the dirt up with her Puma sneakers as she strolled from the mound to home plate, dirtying her dark blue jeans, which the saleswoman had referred to as boyfriend jeans. If there was one thing that was certain, it was her immediate disdain for shopping in the women’s department. All in all, she still thought she looked more like a girl in boy’s clothing though, so the trip was not a total loss.
Cael looked out from home plate as if she were at bat in a game and dug her soles into the hard ground next to the plate. There was quite a divot there from a year’s worth of players digging in before an at bat, which had not yet been fixed by the ground’s crew. November generally saw the baseball fields remain completely empty other than the occasional game of tee ball or Indian ball that some of the students on campus would organize. Cael swung her arms as if she had a bat in them, closing her eyes so that she could immerse herself in the illusion of being in a game. Even now she could hear the crowd’s roar, driving her to play her best. Her imaginary bat rifled through the strike zone and of course connected with an imaginary ball. Daydreams always had a knack for having positive outcomes.
The girl began a slow trot along the base path, or at least where it would have been if the fields were marked or if there were any bases to be found other than home plate. She was milking the ersatz crowd, waving to fans that were not there, pointing up to the heavens as she rounded first, throwing in every little quirk that she had seen Major Leaguers perform on their home run trots. She stopped as she reached second, however, switching to a fielding position. She ran from a spot between first and second to where the second base bag would normally be, pivoted and turned to throw to first and turn the double play. Her mock game came to an abrupt halt when she saw Brooke waiting near the first base line.
Brooke was baffled when she unexpectedly found a girl on the field instead of her boyfriend. The way she was dancing around the field, she guessed that she was a softball player or really liked baseball. She looked around with a bewildered look on her face, hoping to find Cael hiding somewhere. There was only this girl though and she was staring right at Brooke now that she was aware of her presence.
“Um… hello? Have you seen a guy waiting here? He’s pretty tall and strong. You might know him even. He’s one of the stars of the baseball team—Cael Foley.” Brooke questioned the girl, whose expression betrayed her nerves.
Cael lifted her head and her bright blue eyes caught Brooke’s attention. There was something familiar about the girl. It took a moment to place her, but she was sure that this was the same mystery girl that Trip’s mom had asked her about at the wake a few days earlier.
“Oh, it’s you.” Brooke spoke, sounding as if she was let down. It was rather curious that she would run into this girl now twice where she expected to find Cael. “Did Cael send you to talk to me or something? That’s just so typical. He brings me out here on a cold day with a cryptic message and then doesn’t even show up.”
“No, that’s not what happ—” Cael started to object before she saw Trip walking toward the field, just as bundled up as everyone else. “You brought Trip along? This was supposed to be one on one. Why is he here?”
“He’s giving me a ride home and he’s Cael’s friend. Cael never said anything about wanting to speak alone, and he’s not even here, so why do you care? Why are you even here?” Brooke shot back.
“You sure are spending a lot of time with Trip lately.” Cael insinuated. It seemed as if every time she saw Brooke lately, Trip was tagging along not too far behind like a sick puppy dog. He gave her a ride to Cael’s birthday party, drove her home from the hospital, hung out with her when Cael bailed on going out, brought her to the wake, and now was right by her side again. It was all a bit disconcerting and perhaps because Cael was feeing especially defensive, she became paranoid about her best friend and her girlfriend’s relationship.
“That’s none of your business.” Brooke fired at her. “Trip’s my friend and he’s been there for me when Cael hasn’t lately. So, don’t even start spitting your suspicions at me. If there’s anybody that needs to explain themselves around here, it’s you. What is your relationship to Cael? Who are you even?”
“What’s going on?” Trip asked, staring at Cael and then at Brooke, looking as baffled as Brooke had been when she arrived.
“That girl is going on. She’s the one from the wake, remember? She’s the one that Jimmy was hitting on.”
Cael exhaled. With fingers all pointed at her, she was now at the crucial time where she needed to explain what happened. There was no delicate way to tell them and she was not sure that the stories she planned to convince them were all that convincing.
“I knew this was going to be a mistake. I shouldn’t have invited you out here.” Cael berated herself.
Brooke was already dumbstruck at the casual admittance. Here she was expecting Cael when this girl was the one that invited her. It did not make sense. Not only did she not know who this girl was, but she was sure that she had been talking to Cael online two days earlier.
“Wait, you invited me? What were you doing with Cael’s phone and on his computer, and why would you want me to come out here and talk? Is he cheating on me? Please tell me that you’re not his new girlfriend.”
“No, I’m not cheating on you. No offense, but that’s just stupid, Brooke.”
Cael took a step forward, holding her hands out in front of her defensively to show that she had peaceful intentions. The way that Trip and Brooke were looking at her made her think that they already thought that she belonged in a straight jacket. She had not even said anything damning yet.
“Now, I want you both to listen to me. I’m going to try to explain what’s been going on as best I can, but if you keep jumping to conclusions like that, you’re not going to get to hear the truth.” Cael instructed.
Brooke nodded in consent and nudged Trip, who did the same.
“Okay, even though I didn’t anticipate him being here, I’m going to start with Trip. Hopefully what I say to him will convince you both.” Cael spoke, taking a deep breath again. “Trip, buddy, you might not believe it, but I’ve known you for a long time. We met on our first day of school and you’ve been my best friend ever since.”
“I know you said to listen, but it’s a little difficult to keep an open mind when you’re speaking as if you’re Cael.” Trip interjected.
Cael turned her head away, embarrassed. She was hoping that speaking in her own voice would help them figure things out on their own, but instead it was just coming across as strange. She did not want to refer to herself in the third person. That was strange to her, and pretending she was not herself when the whole point of the conversation was to tell them who she was seemed a bit pointless.
“Please just let me speak, Trip. I promise that I’ll be more persuasive. Quick disclaimer—nobody else told me what I’m about to say, so please don’t accuse me of getting the knowledge second-hand.” Cael paused, taking another deep breath. She was worried that she would start hyperventilating at any moment if she did not keep breathing. “Okay, do you remember when we were about ten years old and we were staying at my Aunt Stephanie’s house?”
“Where is she going with this and why does she keep referring to herself as if she’s Cael?” Brooke leaned over and whispered to Trip. He just shrugged. Stephanie took care of Cael and Trip all the time when they were kids because both of them came from two income families. She was a cheap alternative to day care and the boys did not mind because she let them get away with a ton.
“Yeah, I remember staying at her house, though it was with Cael. The only girl I remember there was his cousin, Laura, and you’re definitely not her.”
“Well, when we were about ten, we were staying there and Aunt Steph rented a bunch of movies for us to watch. One of those movies was Jurassic Park.” Cael revealed.
Trip instantly started to look tense. There was only one story that started with him watching that movie because he refused to watch it ever since. Only a few people knew the story though—himself, Stephanie, Laura and Cael. This girl should not have known about that particular incident, not unless somebody told her about it, but Laura and Cael both promised never to tell. Cael’s Aunt was another problem as it was difficult to get adults to keep secrets about their children, yet outside of conversations with Cael and Laura, nobody had ever mentioned that day until now.
“We were watching the movie and were really into it. Well, we get to the scene where Ellie is going to turn the power back on. The velociraptor jumps out and we both screamed, but apparently you were a little more frightened than I was because—”
“Stop right there!” Trip interrupted. “You don’t need to tell that story. I don’t know what you have to prove, but don’t tell the rest, please.”
“I think you know what I’m trying to prove.” Cael returned. “I just don’t think you’re ready to believe me yet, so I might as well finish it.”
“But—”
“Let her tell it.” Brooke stopped Trip. “I’m sure it can’t be that embarrassing and with what she’s insinuating, I think we’re due a little proof.”
Cael could not help but smirk a little. She might not have said it outright, but at least the two of them knew what she was trying to say. It was a shame that she had to break a few promises in the course of proving who she was, but with the disbelieving stare that Brooke was giving her, she had no other choice.
“Trip got so scared when that raptor jumped out that he wet himself. This brought the movie to a screeching halt as I started laughing at him and he got really mad at me for doing so. Aunt Steph heard our fighting, came in and saw what happened.” Cael relayed. “I, of course, got in trouble for laughing at him, but Trip got a much worse fate. Aunt Steph was just trying to help hide it so that Trip’s mom wouldn’t find out, but deciding to wash his soiled clothing left him without any pants or underwear to wear.”
Brooke turned to Trip, who was bright red in the face from a mix of anger, embarrassment and the cold. She could see that the story was getting to him, but did not want to interrupt again to ask him if it was true. It was not totally uncommon for a child that age to have an accident, so there had to be more to it.
“Now, you know how short Trip is. He’s always been short for his age. I mean, I’m taller than him now and I’m a girl.” Cael continued. “Anyway, when you’re a little kid and you’re as small as he is, that rules out being able to borrow a pair of underwear from the man of the house. My cousin, Laura, however, is only two years younger than us. At the time, she was about the same size as Trip, so while his clothes dried, Aunt Steph made him wear a pair of her panties and shorts. Believe me, it was hilarious seeing Trip in hot pink shorts, though it was probably better than seeing him in floral print panties.”
Brooke was giggling a little now, which made Trip turn a deeper shade of red. True or not, it was a funny story and the thought of Trip wearing bright pink shorts made for a girl was hilarious.
“Did that really happen?” Brooke asked him in between giggles.
“Yes,” he muttered, “and Cael promised not to tell anybody that story too. Some friend he is.”
“I didn’t tell anybody!” Cael shouted. “This is the first time I’ve ever brought it up. I don’t get what the big freaking deal is anyway. It’s not like Brooke was going to sleep with you!”
Something snapped in Trip and he approached Cael like he was going to hit her. She stood right up to him and stared him down. The two long-time friends looked like they were going to clobber each other right then and there.
“You are not Cael! Just because you know some story about me doesn’t mean that you’re him. You’re a girl for God’s sake! Why the Hell would you ever think we’d believe you?” Trip growled.
“I know I’m a girl!” Cael shouted, tears welling up in the corners of her eyes. “Don’t you think I know that? Don’t you think that I’m reminded of it every damned day? Fuck, do you think I want to be like this? I thought you would believe me because you’re my friends and friends trust one another implicitly.”
“See, you’re crying now too. Cael doesn’t cry. He’s the strongest person I know and I don’t think I’ve seen him cry since he was a little boy. I don’t know who you are or why you want us to believe that you’re him, but it isn’t funny.”
“Trip, stop.” Brooke spoke up. “She’s right. If we were really Cael’s friends, then we would believe her on her word alone. I’m not saying that I do believe her, but I would like to. If it explains why he’s been gone for so long, then don’t we have an obligation to hear her out?”
Cael wiped her tears away on the sleeve of her jacket. If she could convince Brooke, she knew that she would talk Trip into believing her too. She was just surprised at how badly Trip was taking it so far. She thought perhaps it was because she chose such an embarrassing story to tell and that he was just mad at her.
“Okay, then I guess I need to tell a story about you too, Brooke.” She started.
“Wait, I want to ask you a question instead of having you tell some secret about me. Trip is right, you could be a friend of Laura’s or a cousin we don’t know or something that was just told about Trip’s hot pants. In order to be sure that you are who you say you are, you need to say something that couldn’t be rehearsed.”
“That’s fine.” Cael consented.
Brooke thought about it. Her plan was two fold. First, she could alleviate any doubts she had if this girl could answer the question. Second, she could control what was revealed about her rather than having her let out some secret that she did not want known. Trip’s story had been really mortifying after all and if this girl was Cael, then she knew a lot about her that she would rather not have Trip know.
“What happened the first time that you tried to stay the night at my apartment? I say you, of course, assuming that you are indeed Cael.”
“Well, it was after an away game and we were getting back rather late. I was sore and we lost the game, so you invited me over to cheer me up. I’d like to say that things were going pretty well at this point. You were pampering me.” Cael recalled. “You were giving me a post-dinner back rub and the night started to pick up. We started making out and naturally progressed our way to the bedroom. Naturally, I was excited because we had not gotten to that was going to be our first time together, but your ratty little dog had other plans.”
“Don’t call Bongo ratty. He’s an angel!” Brooke defended her dog, which was a Yorkshire terrier.
“Yeah, well, he sure has strange ways of showing it. We took off our clothes and were getting ready for the main event. I was on top of you and then I hear Bongo yapping away at me. He was growling at me so I shooed him away, which just pissed off the little bugger even more.” She groaned. “I guess he thought I was hurting you or something because he bit me right on the lip. Frankly, that ruined the mood a little and even more when I lashed out at him. You kicked me out before I even had a chance to get dressed and I really thought we were going to break up after that.”
Brooke smiled a little. The only person she ever told that to was Tracy and she doubted that Cael would go telling anyone that he got bullied by a tiny dog and then kicked out with his pants around his ankles for fighting back.
“What was worse than that though was that you made me apologize to the little monster and talk baby talk to him. That’s why I like cats. They take care of themselves and don’t have jealous fits when you’re in bed with their mommies.”
“Cael? Is that really you in there?” Brooke asked, taking a step closer to look at the girl.
“Yes. I’ve been trying to tell you that. I guess you want to know why I’m a girl now, don’t you?”
Trip stood with his arms crossed, not ready to take that leap that Brooke was. At the same time, he could not deny the possibility that she was telling the truth. As crazy as it sounded, it explained Cael’s absence and his lack of communication with his friends. This girl looked like she could be Cael’s sister too, so the physical and anecdotal evidence seemed to match up. The only problem was that believing that Cael was now a girl meant believing in the possibility that magic existed. Would he have to rethink everything he knew about the world?
Cael recounted the story of how she became a girl in lengthy detail. She talked about how painful the transformation had been and the fact that she was having constant mood swings since the change. She told them about her father dying and how a mistake he made years ago left her stuck in a body that felt like a prison. She told them why she had avoided them for so long, why she never answered her phone and why she was so afraid of what they would think. The story was even longer than when her mother told her it as she had a week’s worth of details to tack on to the end. The tale accomplished what she wanted, however. Trip had notably softened his stance by the end of the story and was looking her over like he was trying to find bits of his friend in her comely form.
Brooke’s reaction was the complete opposite. Where she had shown compassion for Cael before the story, she seemed unamused by the end. She was right with Cael up until the day after the transformation. From that point forward though, she was practically glaring at Cael as she spoke.
“Anyway, that’s the whole story. I’m not sure how long I’m going to be stuck like this, but as soon as I can I want to go back to Ireland and see if I can talk the Púca into changing me back.”
“This is all a bit too odd for me.” Trip spoke. “I mean, I’ve known Cael, er—you since we were five years old. To think, my best friend was born a girl. This is going to take a while to get used to.”
“Well, if you still don’t believe me, we can always call up my mom and she can confirm it. She has baby pictures and birth certificates and everything. It was all very convincing.”
Trip noticed that Brooke was steaming. Cael was too busy telling her story until now and did not realize that her girlfriend was fuming mad.
“Brooke, are you ok—”
Brooke’s palm smacked against Cael’s cheek with enough force to make the girl stumble back. Cael was shocked, not only by how much one little slap to the cheek hurt, but by the fact that the woman that had been so tender when Trip was accusing her of being a liar had just slapped her.
“What was that for?” Cael demanded.
“That was for waiting an entire week to tell us this stuff! Did you see how easy it was to get us to believe you? You were right earlier when you said that friends trust one another implicitly, so why didn’t you trust us enough to tell us right after it happened? You are so selfish Cael! I’ve been worried about you all week long, thinking that you were suicidal or just didn’t want to see me anymore and this is what was keeping you away?” Brooke ranted. “If you really valued our relationship, you would have had me come over the first day. I’m supposed to be your girlfriend and you just sat there at the wake and listened to me pouring my heart out to an empty bedroom. You were right there and you said nothing!”
“I’m sorry.” Cael muttered. “I was scared. I’m still scared. Please, forgive me.”
“You want me to forgive you? You might have been through Hell the last week, but you’ve been putting me through it too. I should break up with you. I’m not attracted to girls and with the way you’ve treated me, you honestly don’t deserve to have me in your life. There’s a part of me that wants to never speak to you again, but I’m not going to do that.” Brooke said. “I have no close female friends anymore after Tracy and I had our falling out—which you should have been there to comfort me by the way. Now, you come to me as a girl and I have the chance to be there for you when you need me. Our relationship might not be the same as it was, but I’m still your friend and I’m not going to abandon you. I’m going to make sure that nobody else does either. I know Trip wouldn’t dare quit on you.”
Trip nodded, placing his hand on Cael’s shoulder, giving her a brotherly smile.
“Like I said, it will take some getting used to. I mean, we took baths together as kids. I’ve seen your junk far more often than I would have liked to and now you look like this. You’re far too cute.” Trip said with a chuckle. “I think I’m going to have a hard time calling you Cael even. Maybe we should come up with a girl’s name for you.”
“Maybe I should shove my fist through your teeth!” Cael shouted back.
“Oh come on, Cael. You’ve been a girl for a week and you haven’t thought at all about having a girl’s name?” Brooke asked.
“I did, but only when my mom showed me my birth certificate. My name’s supposed to be Caitlin apparently. It’s not a horrible name, but I’m not going to go by it. I would prefer it if you didn’t tease me about it too.”
“How is that fair? You went and told Brooke about me wearing a little girl’s panties! If I want to call you Caitlin, Catie or Cait a few times, I should get to.” Trip declared.
“I think my thing is a little worse than you having to borrow Laura’s panties because you wet yourself. Give me a break!”
Brooke scanned down to Cael’s lower half, particularly around her hips. She wished she had X-ray vision right then. The talk of panties again made her wonder.
“You don’t happen to be wearing—”
“No! Hell no! It’s boxers all the way for me. Can we please stop with the teasing now? I’m sensitive about all of this.”
Brooke nodded and slipped her arms around Cael’s back, giving her former boyfriend a tight hug. Her hands rubbed Cael’s back lightly, pressing down on the girl’s jacket as she hugged her. The friendly hug was just what Cael needed, so it took her a few moments to figure out that Brooke was searching for something.
“I’m not wearing a bra either, Brooke.”
“Sorry, couldn’t resist.” She said with a smile, hugging Cael even tighter. “I’m just happy that you’re relatively okay. Just don’t shut me out of your life again.”
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